Misery in Pictures: Eagles’ O Goes Limp in Cincy

Established: the kicker is great!

14 photos
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ASSOCIATED PRESS
The Eagles lost to the Bengals 22-9 Friday night, and just like last week Kevin Kolb's offense had to settle for field goals. And only field goals. The Eagles' first team has yet to score a touchdown.
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NBC 5 News
In related news, the kicking game is <i>awesome</i>! David Akers was three for three! Who needs touchdowns?!?!
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Redferns
Oh, right. Colonel Mustard, on the field, with the headset.
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Getty Images
Kevin Kolb finished 11 for 17 for 126 yards, the majority of which came when the Bengals began substituting their defense. Kolb's O even failed to score given first-and-goal at the 7-yard line.
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Getty Images
Michael Vick fared no better. He went 1-for-5 with two interceptions, stats almost admirable in their putridity. Boy, we sure can't wait for that game against the Jets!
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Getty Images
Mike Kafka went 4-for-12 for 29 yards and two interceptions. We're sensing a pattern here, and that pattern is a brown Pucci print.
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Kyle Branston
Despite the Eagles' plan of "grab his legs," Cedric Peerman scored two touchdowns and one two-point conversion in the fourth quarter.
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Getty Images
Not everything was bad, though, just most things, and not this: Juqua Parker got his hands on Carson Palmer. (We're reaching, bear with us.)
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Kyle Branston
Brandon Graham even fashioned bikini bottoms from the legs of an opposing player. What can't he do?
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Larry Hobbs
And there was teamwork! Platitude posters everywhere approve.
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ASSOCIATED PRESS
Trent Cole managed some pressure, too. Palmer threw two interceptions when trying to connect with mouthy wideout Chad Ochocinco...
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Getty Images
...who went dancing with the cartoon stars after being sandwiched between two Eagles.
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AFP/Getty Images
As soon as the NFL allows Trent Cole tackles to count for 6, the Eagles should be fine.
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Frank Heinz, NBC DFW
But it doesn't get more disturbing that this: J.T. O'Sullivan's carnie stache outplayed Michael Vick and Mike Kafka combined by roughly 40 points. Fortunately, Philly plays the Chiefs next week, and that's a would-be palate cleanser if we've ever heard of one.
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