It's time for a showdown. There’s always tension whenever the hunter and the hunted meet face to face. The watering hole is where the young cubs gather to drink, making them a favorite target, but it’s the lone individual that’s more at risk. The stealthy cougar waits patiently, then goes in for the attack. It's only a matter of time until the prey is brought down.
No, you're not watching the most recent episode of Animal Kingdom, but you do have a bird's eye view at your local bar to witness “when cougars attack.”
The question is, although there’s an age difference, is it really a big deal? How old is too old and can the relationship really work?
Steph:
Let’s get one thing straight before we travel through this dating safari. There is, and always will be, a double standard when it comes to calculating numbers.
Women get a bad rap for going after younger men. They’re automatically viewed as robbing the cradle and trespassing in forbidden territory. But let’s face it we all know women mature much faster than men.
My guess is, cougars date younger men for one or all of the following reasons:
1) Men their age don't want them.
2) They believe they can mold a boy into the man they want.
3) Younger men are in their prime.
On the flip side men get props for exploring fresh new meat and conquering the highly coveted younger species. Being a woman, I’m not saying anything’s necessarily wrong with that, especially when it’s important to be evenly yoked with your mate. More often than not, this means a disparity in age will occur.
So once you’re able to digest this cold harsh truth, it’s up to you to set the terms on how you run things in your own dating kingdom.
No one can help who they fall in love with, just keep in mind that numbers may seem important in the beginning but there comes a point in life when the only thing that matters is true happiness.
So, after you’ve given the relationship time to grow and you’re certain you’ve met the one for you, don’t be afraid to mark your territory. Who knows, you may be headed down the threshold to the survival of the fittest -- marriage!
Matt:
Cougars, manthers and tigers, oh my! The concept of a cougar is nothing new. Long before Stifler's mom, there was Mrs. Robinson in the 70s. As for manthers, you can't ignore the granddaddy of all sugar daddies, Hugh Hefner. God bless you, Hef.
Most of the time the hookup is out of curiosity. Girls get tired of dealing with immature guys their own age and they want to feel more grown up. For the fellas, it's more of a fantasy to be with an experienced woman who can show them the ropes.
I agree with Steph, men have, for the most part, dated younger. Heck, they'll take it as far as they "legally" can go (but they don't want Chris Hanson from “To Catch A Predator” popping out of the bushes with his camera crew).
On the guy's end, you should try to keep the age range between 10 to 12 years. If not, you start to increase the generation gap. Even with that, the maturity level needs to be close in range. Perhaps the young cub is 25 going on 30 and the 40 year-old sugar daddy -- with his Peter Pan complex -- has the maturity of a 35-year-old. Then they’re only five years apart. What can I say? It’s the new dating math.
Now, there’s always an exception to the rule. For example, Ashton and Demi. Mainly it’s because she looks great for her age -- I mean really good. But remember, when you’re out on a date, you want to look more like someone’s boyfriend/girlfriend, not the chaperone.
Question: Tell us your thoughts on dating older/younger. Are you an age difference success story?
Do you have a dating dilemma? Send Stephanie and Matt your story and questions and you may be featured on the next installment of Save the Date.
