Guess it's a good thing I didn't start working on this last week, you know, before Sam Bradford got traded.

Welcome to perhaps the most unpredictable year of Eagles football since... well, either last year, or before I began covering the team for this storied blog nearly a decade ago. Not really sure, although even in Chip Kelly's first go-round as head coach in 2013, at least everybody had seen the quarterbacks, Nick Foles and Michael Vick. Doug Pederson has Carson Wentz, a rookie out of FCS North Dakota State who played in one preseason game, and Chase Daniel, going on age 30 with all of two career starts in the NFL. Talk about inexperience. And we still don't even know whether the starting right tackle will be suspended for 10 games or not.

Anybody who pretends to know how this season is going to go down for the Eagles is full ot it — as is always the case. That being said, this is exactly how it's gonna go down.

Well, maybe not exactly. The win-loss prediction, I'll own it. This is my best guess at the Eagles' record in 2016, and based on how I fared last season, there should be little incentive to bet your life savings on the fleeting whims that I'm about to pass off as convictions. Please, don't do that. As for the back stories to these imagined outcomes, those are purely for fun, so since you already clicked through, why don't you try having some instead of calling me an idiot for claiming this team is going to win 11 games.

Just kidding. Projections ahead.

Week 1 v Cleveland Browns (Sunday, 1:00)

Fun fact: Robert Griffin III owns a 5-16 record as a starting quarterback dating back to his playoff loss with Washington to close out the 2012 season. True, Griffin wasn't necessarily healthy all that time, but then again he probably won't feel too good anymore after Fletcher Cox buries him a couple of times either. The Eagles' defensive line carries the day, while Wentz out-gains RG3 on the ground. It may be Wentz's first start, but they're still the Browns.

WIN, 23-16

Week 2 @ Chicago Bears (Monday, 8:30)

Wentz has played in some pretty big games before, so a Monday night at Soldier Field shouldn't even faze the kid. He's getting comfortable with Zach Ertz as his security blanket, with the tight end going over 100 yards receiving for the night, while for the second week in a row, Jim Schwartz's wide-nine front feeds, as a couple of Michigan natives in Connor Barwin and Brandon Graham torture quarterback Jay Cutler and the Chicago faithful. Get ready to see some Cutler face!

WIN, 26-21

Week 3 v Pittsburgh Steelers (Sunday, 4:25)

You're in for a long day when the Steelers are the opponent and Leodis McKelvin is your No. 1 cornerback. With nobody in the secondary capable of slowing them down, Ben Roethlisberger and Antonio Brown play pitch and catch to their hearts' content, racking up video-game numbers en route to an easy victory over interstate rivals. Nothing to be too ashamed of though, as the Steelers are poised to go on a deep playoff run.

LOSS, 36-10

Week 4 BYE

Week 5 @ Detroit Lions (Sunday, 1:00)

Andy Reid was always amazing coming off of the bye, posting a 15-2 record as a head coach in the regular season after the week off. Since Pederson is essentially supposed to be a slimmed-down version of Reid and everybody just assumes his teams will stink at time management and coaches challenges, we're going to go ahead and assume they're also going to be awesome with the additional rest. If the Kryptonite is the same, the superpower must be too, right?

WIN, 28-13

Week 6 @ Washington (Sunday, 1:00)

Wentz's first taste of the NFC East happens to come against an unconvincing Washington team. Kirk Cousins will try to fit passes into dangerous tight end Jordan Reed all day long, but the fifth-year signal-caller is already falling back down to earth. Cousins tries to force one too many, and Nigel Bradham is there in coverage to deflect the attempt to an opportune Jordan Hicks, who races some 50 yards with the ball for the decisive touchdown. Why do I refer to them only as Washington? Because if nothing else, it irks Dan Snyder.

WIN, 30-24

Week 7 v Minnesota Vikings (Sunday, 1:00)

Sam Bradford will have his revenge on Philly fans, and the timing couldn't feel much sweeter. The Eagles are riding a wave of momentum after an unexpectedly hot start, with Wentz-amania is just beginning to sweep the nation when Bradford returns to town to throw four touchdown passes in a deflating Vikings win. On the bright side, the Eagles get a second-round pick when Bradford catapults Minnesota to a Super Bowl championship this season, the only inevitable conclusion to all of this drama.

LOSS, 35-20

Week 8 @ Dallas Cowboys (Sunday, 8:30)

With Tony Romo still on the shelf, or back on the shelf if he already returned by now, this becomes an epic division showdown between two rookie quarterbacks, and it does not fail to disappoint. Wentz and Dak Prescott go back and forth in an entertaining shootout, until Wentz finds Cowboy-killer Jordan Matthews on a 40-yard touchdown pass late in overtime to give the Eagles the edge. The next day, local sports talk radio anoints the team legit contenders, which of course is loony.

WIN, 37-34

Week 9 @ New York Giants (Sunday, 1:00)

The inevitable Jason Peters injury strikes just in time for the Giants' expensive pass-rush duo of Jason Pierre-Paul and Oliver Vernon to take advantage. Wentz can't get comfortable all day, while Victor Cruz — remember him? — is back from the dead, catching a pair of long touchdown catches from Eli Manning to haunt Eagles nickel cornerbacks Ron Brooks and Jalen Mills, whoever holds the job by then. Eric Rowe already has three interceptions in New England, by the way.

LOSS, 27-13

Week 10 v Atlanta Falcons (Sunday, 1:00)

Last season, Julio Jones made a joke of the Eagles secondary, particularly newcomer Byron Maxwell. This year's big free-agent addition to the defensive backfield has a different plans. The first time Jones comes over the middle, Rodney McLeod lights up the All-Pro receiver with a devastating hit, separating the receiver from the ball. Jones is still posts respectable production, but it's a much quieter outing this time around once McLeod sets the tone. It's also quieter in the locker room postgame now that Maxwell is gone.

WIN, 31-17

Week 11 @ Seattle Seaawks (Sunday, 4:25)

This is a rough road trip for anybody, especially a rookie quarterback — one who's built up half a season's worth of tape for Seattle's stout defense to study at that. The Eagles' receivers simply cannot get open against the oppressive coverage of the Legion of Boom, and Wentz's gunslinger mentality comes back to bite him in this one, as he racks up numerous interceptions in an ugly defeat. There will be much better days ahead, kid.

LOSS, 38-9

Week 12 v Green Bay Packers (Monday, 8:30)

The good news is Wentz bounces back with a productive game, protecting the football and setting a career high with close to 100 yards on the ground as well. The bad news he ran right into Aaron Rodgers, who has a habit of carving up even the best defenses. Rodgers is able to elude the Eagles' pass-rush and out-maneuver Schwartz's scheming, as the Packers clip the Birds in an exciting tilt that goes down to the wire.

LOSS, 34-28

Week 13 @ Cincinnati Bengals (Sunday, 1:00)

Josh Huff is actually having a nice season at this point, but we knew miscues would rear their ugly head eventually. The third-year wideout fumbles the opening kickoff and later bats a Wentz pass high into the air for a red-zone interception, and the points those two plays cost the Eagles are just enough for a good Bengals team to hang on in a defensive struggle. All next week, practice-squader Paul Turner is once again the darling of talk radio.

LOSS, 16-10

Week 14 v Washington (Sunday, 1:00)

Realizing that perhaps they were asking too much of Wentz, the Eagles lean heavily on their ground attack the rest of the way. Ryan Mathews and Kenjon Barner combine to go over 200 yards to help control the pace of the action, while Dorial Green-Beckham is becoming a closer of sorts, catching a pair of fade passes for touchdowns once the offense gets down close by the goal line. By now, Cousins is closely monitoring where there will be QB openings in 2017.

WIN, 24-13

Week 15 @ Baltimore Ravens (Sunday, 1:00)

Some say fellow FBS alumni Joe Flacco is Eagles' fans best hope for Wentz's ceiling. The Ravens have been a model of consistency with Flacco and even won a Super Bowl, all of which Philly would gladly take. The Delaware product provides a glimpse into the future with his performance here, calmly and efficiently dissecting the defense and doing just enough to lead his team to victory. There could be worse outcomes for Wentz than having people debate whether or not he's "elite" for the rest of his career.

LOSS, 27-24

Week 16 v New York Giants (Thursday, 8:30)

The Eagles have owned the Giants in primetime for ages now, and with the playoff race in the NFC East tightening, this Thursday night encounter is no different. Manning spends much of the contest under duress, with Mychal Kendricks and Malcolm Jenkins reaping the rewards via turnovers, one of which is in hilarious fashion, because Eli. Just for good measure, Darren Sproles seals the deal with a 75-yard punt return for touchdown, and just like that, New York is eliminated from postseason contention.

WIN, 21-3

Week 17 v Dallas Cowboys (Sunday, 1:00)

After missing essentially the entire season with various maladies, Romo makes his triumphant return to the Cowboys lineup just in time for the division championship game. Yes, at 8-7, the Eagles have a shot to win the NFC East and host a playoff game. Only the Cowboys can put a stop to it, and they just that as could-ve-bee-an-Eagle Ezekiel Elliot gashes Schwartz's wide-9 front and the Romo-Dez Bryant connection abuses Leodis McKelvin or whoever has replaced him. Wentz tries to do too much and winds up being sidelined by Sean Lee, leading to Chase Daniel's msot extensive action of the season, and it isn't pretty as the backup QB tosses the decisive INT to Orlando Scandrick.

LOSS, 28-20

Despite a loss to their most heated rival in the finale, Wentz showed enough during the course of the season to keep everybody excited about the future. An 8-8 seasons is more than a lot of people were expecting anyway, and between an improved defense and the first-round pick recouped in the Bradford trade, there's a sense the Eagles have a foundation to build upon.