File this one under "I told you so."
Octo-mom Nadya Suleman says she made a few mistakes in her life.
In a video shot in a fondue restaurant and posted to RadarOnline Suleman dips cheesecake in melted chocolate and talks about her problem pregnancies and difficulty with her relationship to the father of her children.
"I screwed myself. I screwed up my life, I screwed up my kids' lives," said Suleman. "I have to put on this strong facade and I have to pretend like I don't regret it."
Suleman gave birth to the world's longest-surviving set of octuplets on Jan. 26, after already having six other children.
All 14 children share a biological father, and Suleman said she felt her connection to him grow with every pregnancy.
"The more kids I had, the stronger connection I had with him," she said.
Suleman said her older children are increasingly curious about who their biological father is. She refuses to identify him, saying she wants to protect his privacy, but also wants him "to somehow, privately, secretly know (the children) in a controlled manner."
According to the video, she didn't tell him she was having more children after the first six, and fears his resentment for the betrayal.
The videographer, identified by Radar as Suleman's best friend, says at one point that the sperm donor has a wife and family. But Suleman warns her away from giving away too much about the man, adding that "he'd lose everything he's created in his own life" if his identity was revealed.